In Real Life [wouldn't let me call it IRL, needs more than 4 letters]

Ryan: Yeah. Just shows either how commited we are to each other or how unwilling I am to talk to strangers. ^ ^ Hehehe.

John:Maybe a little bit of both. *chuckles* Though most people would probably be too sexual with you.

Ryan: Yeah you're right. I'd probably end up sexually assaulted at some point or other with anyone else.

John:Or if you're within 100ft of Path. >,> You wouldn't believe the suggestions he made about me and you while drunk. Well you would, but they're....ugh.

Ryan: Would I like to pierce my ears with the sounds of these suggestions?

John:Well it's not like there's much else to talk about...they aren't like scat or gore, at least.

Ryan: Oh, alright, I guess I could be fine with hearing them.

John:Naturally his first suggestion was to give you an animal-tail butt plug or anal beads and animal ears, cuz he likes that sort of thing. THEN he suggested "at least" three way, because he's jelly of me. He also suggested edible condoms. Not for sexual use, except maybe oral, since he knows how much I like food. He suggested bondage for some reason...and obviously lube-aphrodisiacs.

Ryan: Lube? That's such a thing as aphrodisiacs? I'll bet they don't work anyway.

John:Well there are scented candles based off of certain vegetable and fruit whose scent turns people on. When he asked me what I was intending on doing, I just was talking about using bike shorts and pantyhose, and how I'd have to be extremely lucky to have sex with you and stuff, so I hadn't put much thought towards it.

Ryan: Well yeah, I'm kind of uncomfortable with the idea of us two having sex. I mean, it's perfectly normal in relationships, but yeah...I was asexual for the longest time and such so I've never had to think about it happening to me at all.

John:Yeah I know. Usually sex is a spontaneous thing, too. Both parties aroused by hormones and stuff....and we don't really have that. ^ ^u

Ryan: yeah, i think only you have the hormones. Well we both have them but I....Yeah. >.>

John:Well yeah, I do...but as for you, it's not like you feel an urge to fuck something randomly.

Ryan: Yeah. I've just numbed myself to it all.

John:*nods* Right. That's all fine, of course. If I expected anything else I would've been crazy to get into a relationship with you. *strokes his hair*

Ryan: Unless you really do wanna shove you doodle up my ass. *hugs him*

John:^ ^u Eh, well...I'd like to...when I don't have a headache. In that case you know I'd be gentle about it...though you'd have to clean it out beforehand and all with an enema I think. =.=

Ryan: Clean it? Enema?? What the hell is all that?

John:There might be another way of doing it, but basically it's sending fluids into the rectum and colon through your anus, rapidly expanding them, which is very uncomfortable, involving cramping and bloating, making you feel an extreme need to poop basically, in turn cleaning out all the poop and stuff in there since it makes it extremely easy to poop. It's what is used in colon cleansing and stuff like that. It's also good for your health since you don't have a gigantic mass of brown bacteria living in your bum anymore. But I wouldn't force you to do it. We could always just do oral.

Ryan: Um....Well I have always been scared of that idea of this mass of icky stuff sitting in me so I'd actually like to try that stuff just to see how good I feel afterwards. But yeah, oral's fine, I guess.

John:Hm...well I guess later, then, since we don't have access to disposable enemas around here anyway, we'll try that when we go home, and we can take sex slowly, since...it really isn't that important.

Ryan: I guess we'll start with oral then or something?

John:Yeah...when my headache's done. ^ ^u You sound kind of eager to start, honestly, though.

Ryan: I didn't think I was. But maybe I am? So what if I am? We've been together for over a year, I should be enthusiastic about you.