The Legends of Moemon

Haxorus: *rubs her eyes* ....Okay, I'm gonna go back to sleep and skip past this stupid dream.
Breloom: Stop! *shakes Haxorus by her shoulders* This is real! We're being followed by an Absol with a weird-looking naginata!
Haxorus: And you couldn't just stay and fight?

Umbreon: Well she looked pretty tough and I didn't wanna wake you, personally.

Breloom: Plus, she had her blade at my neck.
Haxorus: *sighs* Fine. Next time, she'll meet me, and wish she hadn't.
(the trio travels onward, circumventing Mauville entirely to avoid suspicion. They travel north through the grasslands, heading toward the forest. We rejoin them traipsing through the extremely tall grass.)
Breloom: Unnnngh...I'm soooo hungry...why couldn't we stock up on provisions in Mauville?
Haxorus: Because A, we don't have any money, and B, we would have been seen, and in case you forgot, we're being chased by some crazy wish-hunter.

Umbreon: I'm sure we can find some food in the wild. Not sure what's edible though.

(a Tropius [You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] emerges from the dense grass, and notices the travelers)
Breloom: Eh? *gasps* Bananas!
Haxorus: Excuse me, could we perhaps have some of your bananas? We're hungry and we don't have any food.
Tropius: Of course! I love spreading satisfaction! But, under one condition.
Haxorus: Anything!
Tropius: I wish to mate with that Umbreon boy. He looks so....delicious...
Breloom: Um.

Umbreon: ...*his belly growls and he clutches it, blushing* Well uh...If it's for free food, I'll do it.

Tropius: Yessss! *grabs Umbreon by the hand*
Breloom: Really? Uh...can I watch?

Umbreon: Um...I'm not sure. Do you really want to watch me?

Haxorus: *puts Breloom in a headlock* No, she doesn't.
Breloom: I do!
Haxorus: Just go in the tall grass, we'll be waiting here.
Tropius: Excellent! *leads Umbreon into the grass, and after a half hour of lively love-making, Tropius emerges from the grass, disheveled and half-naked, with semen dripping down her legs* Ohhh myy~....I think your'e the best I've had in a LONG time...

Umbreon: *comes out red faced and tying his skirt thing* I'm glad you liked it so much...You were...really good too.

Tropius: Oh thank you, my dear. Here! *hands him a huge basket full of bushels of bananas* You earned it. *winks, slaps Umbreon's butt, and flies away into the forest*
Breloom: Hrmph. *crosses her arms*
Haxorus: Hey, at least we have food.

Umbreon: Yeah...I hope I don't have to have sex for food at some other time. It's really embarrassing. *takes out a banana and peels its from its bottom before eating it*

Breloom: Really? Well I hope it's my turn next. I mean, what a bargain!
(the trio continue on their way through the tall grass, and into the forest, where they encounter a village of treehouses, called Fortree. They wonder around until met by an Altaria( [You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] ), who leaps down from the biggest treehouse to meet them.
Altaria: Excuse me travelers, but I am the master of the village, Altaria. Do you...happen to be versed in combat?

Umbreon: Well Breloom here is. I'm not really well versed in fighting, myself.

Haxorus: No one can swing an ax like me. Why?
Altaria: Our village is in trouble! Our riches have been stolen by a tricky Kecleon, and we need them back!
Breloom: Riches, eh? What's in it for us?
Altaria: We'll give you some of it!
Breloom: We're in!

Umbreon: Yeah! So do you know where the kecleon went?

A goodra girl walks over.
Goodra: I saw him pass by a few minutes ago. He stepped in some of my slime.

Altaria: Who are you?.?

Goodra: I'm Goodra. But my friends call me Gooey.

Umbreon: Ah, I'm Umbreon. Where'd you come from though? Never seen your kind before.

Goodra: I'm from Kalos. it's far away from here.

Umbreon: Ah, I see. It's very nice to meet a pokemon from Kalos.

Kalos: I came to see what this place had in store for me.

Umbreon: Well, as far as I've seen, mostly water, pretty much.

Goodra:It's lovely here though.